Pinterest has included lattes souped-up with everything from chia seeds to coconut oil in its list of 100 things to try next year. Do you like your caffeinated beverage with added head-scratching health claims?
Cup of coffee
Name: Super coffee.
Appearance: Silky, indulgent, aspirational.
Ingredients: Coffee, a cup, things to make the coffee even better.
What, like sugar? No.
Crystal meth? I think you’re missing the point. “Super coffee” is one of Pinterest’s top 100 trends for 2018.
Who is Pinterest? It’s more of a what. It’s a social network that lets people collect and share lifestyle ideas. How to make a pile of leaves, what color to paint your baby, that kind of thing.
Oh right. On Pinterest, “better” means more modishly beautiful or questionably health-giving. This year, there has been a 218% increase in the number of super coffee recipes “pinned” on the site – and it expects more to come next year.
What do these recipes contain? All sorts. There’s a turmeric latte with cinnamon, coconut sugar, vanilla paste, almond milk and ginger.
Blimey. That’s going to taste of a lot of things. I expect so. There’s also a coffee-banana smoothie with oats and chia seeds.
Mmm … gloopy. Yes, chia seeds have that effect, but they are also one of the “superfoods” that lend their unproved powers to super coffee.
And this is going to be popular, is it? Apparently.There are even companies selling bottles of ready-made super coffee.
Do they make a lot of head-scratching health claims? They sure do. Apparently, the medium‑chain triglycerides in coconut oil have “some antimicrobial activity, clearing your gut of bad bacteria”.
I hope they have evidence for that. I’m sure they do.
What else is on trend for 2018? Loads. Christmas-in-July parties, tattooing your fingers, soup.
Not super soup? Nope. Just ordinary soup.
I see. Anyway, why spoil a lovely cup of coffee with all this weirdness? People like weird things, I guess. Have you ever tried bulletproof coffee?
I didn’t get where I am today by trying things. Evidently. Well, bulletproof coffee replaces milk with butter and coconut oil, then blitzes the whole thing into a froth. This is reputed to suppress your hunger and make you energetic.
Like a healthy alternative to crystal meth? Much healthier, yes.
Do say: “People secretly thinking you’re smug and annoying looks like a hot new trend in 2018.”
Don’t say: “Mmm … claptrap.”